We had no explanation for “why” this was happening, and we didn’t know “when” it would end. Even if we had the answers to those questions, I don’t know that they would suffice. The answers would only bring a temporary and false peace for the time. We’ve had to choose to move beyond the “why” and “when” questions, and ask the important question: How will we choose to deal with this uncertainty?
There have been days where I haven’t sought God in this pulling. I’ve pulled up my bootstraps (or my mom pants), and tried to keep it all in line. But God was patient with me. Gently showing me that something needed to change. I needed to rely on Him in the big and little decisions (and indecision) each day.
When feeling overwhelmed or indecisive, I need to stop and realize that this is a signal. I need to turn these thoughts over to God, and demonstrate that to my children. Show them that Mommy needs God just as much as anyone else.
God provides…
Direction where there seems to be none.
Certainty in a world where uncertainty reigns.
Truth when the world screams at us from different directions.
Peace beyond our understanding or what this world can provide.
And Rest. Rest that renews our spirit and fills our bodies with true life.
I need that reminder daily.
More battles were sneaking into our morning routine. Morning transitions were becoming extremely difficult for my four-year-old… Even after I had gotten my “to-do” list done for the morning, I still found myself escaping into e-mails or checking “events” we could attend on my phone. I would read articles, pay a bill, or check out books that I’d want to read, all the while justifying it as “getting things done”. My quality time kept getting pushed aside and I was piling on more and more distractions that took me away from actually addressing the heart issues in myself and my children.