Retreat to Rest in Order to Be Filled
After rising very early in the morning, while it was still dark, he departed and went out to a desolate place, and there he prayed.
-Mark 1:35
The week leading up to Thanksgiving 2018, I was still a wreck from my dad passing away earlier that year. Our family typically trekked over to my in-laws for a Thanksgiving meal, but that year I dreaded the upcoming holiday. Maybe it was the grief or being overwhelmed as a mom at the time, but I remember suffocating in indecision as to whether I should attend or not.
I felt the pull to please others and make myself present. I didn’t want to be the topic of speculative conversation- Why couldn’t she show up? What else would she be doing? I also didn’t want to put the pressure on my husband to take care of a baby and a toddler on his own at a larger family gathering.
But I was also completely overwhelmed with grief. I had no desire to be around people. I just needed a break from being a mom of young kids. I needed to process my thoughts, relax, and cry without having to move to another room to be away from others. That Thanksgiving evening would be one of the few chances I had to actually rest.
Thankfully, on the day of, I decided to stay home. My husband completely understood and supported my decision. The kids survived at my in-laws, and so did my husband. And to my knowledge, I wasn’t the topic of conversation, and even if I was, staying home was still worth it.
I remember spending that evening in prayer, journaling, turning on the TV to watch golf- which my dad loved, reading, taking a bath, and going to bed early in some cozy pajamas. The quiet of our home was what I needed to unwind, relax, and process the year.
That year of slowing down, because I needed to, really taught me a lot about what’s most important. For too long, I had been making decisions to please others, often at the expense of sabotaging myself. From that point forward, I knew I didn’t need to be everything to everyone all the time. It didn’t happen overnight, but God slowly began showing me where I needed to start taking better care of myself.
In order to fully use and live out the calling God has placed on my life, I needed to prioritize taking time for myself. Like Jesus, I needed to retreat in order rest. I needed to spend time with my Father in heaven, and simply be alone in order to be filled and renewed.
(See: Mark 6:31-32, Matthew 14:13, Matthew 15:29, Mark 14:32, Luke 6:12-13).
As the years have gone by since that time, I still seek out those quiet, still places that fill my cup. In the early waking hours at my kitchen table, in a coffee shop reading my Bible, or in the evenings- praying in the dark of night. Retreating to rest has allowed the Lord to fill my cup.
So, what does your Christmas and New Year’s season look like? Are you making space for rest, time alone with the Lord, and simply being alone? While some may see these things as adding “one more thing to my to-do list”, it’s not that at all.
By spending time in prayer, re-connecting with God in repentance and thanksgiving, we are being rejuvenated and filled-up in the Spirit to further go about our days and weeks ahead. None of us can pour from an empty cup. Even Jesus knew when His cup needed to be filled when He was in His physical form on this earth. Let Christ be our example as we seek Him for rest, healing, restoration, and hope in this Christmas season and always.
**If you are grieving this holiday season due to the loss of a loved one, please check out Grief Share. You can find a group in your area to help support you during the holidays which can be especially difficult. I attended this wonderful group back in 2018, and it really helped me navigate my grief during the holidays. Your loss could have happened recently or years ago, but this group is here to support you in your time of need.
Merry Christmas & Happy New Year to you and yours in 2024! Thank you for reading, supporting, and commenting!
I am still working on my book, so I will not be on WordPress or posting as frequently, but I will respond to your comments when I see them. Thank you for your continued prayers and support on this writing journey.
No matter when I hear from you we always seem to be on the same page. I was just sharing this same ideology with someone yesterday. Not only do we need to learn to rest in the Lord, but to prioritize the time we seek Him and find a time to be still to hear Him. Blessings and Peace!
I’m so glad to hear that! I love how God works and connects us with people sharing the same truth from His Word. Blessings & peace to you as well! Merry Christmas!
Thank you. Amber, for your work. This post is so well written and expresses so well such times that many experience but likely never or rarely discuss. I’m sure it must have been very difficult to lose your Dad. I can relate. Many go through such experiences without properly grieving. I had a good friend many years ago who moderated Grief Share meetings and I attended one. She had suffered great personal losses in life and the Lord chose well when He placed her in that position. I had yet to grieve a great loss of a few years before but did so during the next year. Grieving is very important. Many were taught in the past quite erroneously to hold everything inside a be strong, keeping a stiff upper lip as it were but this usually results in ongoing negative reactions and releases until the wound is healed. For many it never is. I am glad you had your own Thanksgiving Day alone with the Lord, our great loving Father, to reflect on what is most important. Many blessings to you and your family, Amber. I hope you all have a very Merry Christmas!
Thank you fur the compliment and your insight on Grief Share, RJ. And you’re right, grieving is very important, and it’s often a slow process that our Western society wants to speed up or ignore and “move forward”. But this often leads to both mental and physical health issues. Merry Christmas to you as well! Thanks for stopping by, again!