Full Life Reflections: December 15th While Christmas is a season of joy and peace for those who put their trust in Christ, it can also be a season of immense grief. Between broken families, wars, trauma, exploitation, loss, poverty, health issues, and death, sometimes it’s hard to feel “happy” at Christmas. All of the songs, parties, and lights can feel […]
Doubt and fear began to stir inside me. The enemy’s voice was now in my head. This church is different. It’s smaller. He continued to point out all the differences- the greeting time, the music, the lighting, the children’s drop off in the nursery, and so on. This is the way. I knew it, but why was this so hard?
My own selfish voice of wanting what was easier set in, “Where is this going? Why am I supposed to be here? It was easier where I was. I was comfortable. I don’t like walking in these doors with two young children and not knowing anyone. Help.”
I kept going and going and going. Every Sunday. Like clockwork. I am naturally an introvert, so this was difficult in itself.
I prayed hard every time I got in my car and drove up to the church. I felt uncomfortable for so long, but it slowly began to dissipate.
I couldn’t see all God was doing, but I was trusting Him in the midst of waiting. That was the hardest part.